I wasn’t sure where to place this post so I have chosen to post it in both of my blogs.
I was talking to a group of ladies a few weeks ago about marriage and single-hood and the topic came up twice about why they weren’t sure if they wanted to be married. Their decision or lack thereof really boiled down to their perception of their parent’s marriage. These adult children were trying to wrap their minds around a topic of which they had not taken the time to understand from their parents perspective. They had not asked the tough questions because they may have been afraid of the answers.
When parents have challenges in their marriage and their adult children are aware it takes the Superman and Superwoman suits off and leaves the parents looking vulnerable. Adult children then have to choose to accept the frailty of their parent’s humanity or try to maintain the perfect picture of their perfect parents. The perfect parent who had an adulterous affair is now the enemy to the child even though the other parent has forgiven them. The perfect parent who stayed with her husband through many job losses or changes is seen as weak rather than strong for honoring her vows “for richer and poorer.” The perfect parent is seen as a doormat for supporting the other parent’s dreams and not following their own rather than a person of wisdom who understood that supporting their spouse’s dream was… (finish reading here)
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Just another day’s journey of learning how to help others understand the truth about marriage. Peace.